Помогите перевести,словарик ибо плохо работаетWhen grandma was little, there was nothing.

Помогите перевести,словарик ибо плохо работает
When grandma was little, there was nothing. I go to the kitchen and pointing at the microwave:
- But was it?
"No," says grandma.
At the toaster.
- No.
On a gas stove.
- No.
For a mixer.
- No.
I point to the fridge.
- No.
On the chandelier.
- No. When I was little, we had a kerosene lamp. The contrary was it cleaned. Worse than the pot to wash. And then stretched the wire and lit up the light bulb. But the chandeliers were not.
We go into the room.
Computer.
- No.
TV.
- No.
Wardrobe.
- No.
The bed was?
- I - no, - replied grandma.
- How so? - I do not understand. How do you live when you have nothing! As I will about you an essay to write?
- You sleep with someone, says grandma, a former teacher of Russian language and literature.
I shake my head. I'm almost a straight a student, who I write off? If only...
- Grandma d! happily I cry. - You're in essay writing when in school. The school that you had?
Grandma agrees. School was something. And grandma was a straight a student like me. She is the first from the village graduated from University and returned to their home school to be a teacher.
Then we have to go to the village to climb into the attic and look for my writings, - said the grandmother, if I have them in paper did not pass.
Well, Yes, computers did not exist before, everything was stored in the attic. I don't mind. I love the grandmother's village. There are two rivers and mountains, and the strawberry grows on the mountains and the gardens - honey apples, transparent, glowing like a star. And the stars there are! The size of large apples. In such will never see. But grandma's village far in the Altai region, among the school year will not go.
- It is necessary to remember, - strictly I said. - You don't want I couple got.
- Too late, excuses grandma. - I'm going to cook pies.
Grandma is always something to do. "Man to die, get ready, and zemelku Pasha" - I hate when she says so.
- And pies-what on earth was when you were little? - I ask.
The pies were. Along with my grandmother going to cook the pies in the Granny. Otherwise, I will elicit what to write in essay.
Of course, really, grandma, pie will not work. All you need is milk from real cows that spent the whole day walking in the meadow. And fresh eggs from happy free chickens and not from the whole life sitting in a cage. And wheat flour, over which shone hlebosol. Hlebosol - it's so bright-bright silent storm. They sparkle over the fields when the wheat ripens. Very nice. And need a real stove - no microwave / oven can't replace the stove. Need grandma's village to get grandma's pies.